Friday, December 14, 2012

this isn't nice to say, but I gotta get it out

I thought I was pregnant.  All the symptoms, odd achy uterus, tired, peeing a lot, sore boobs.

Just got my period. 

I'm disappointed, but not devistaed.


But what really gets my goat, is that people get pregnant by accident.  That really cheeses me off.  I mean, I have two old friends that this happened to.  Part of me is stomping my feet and clenching my fists and yelling *it's not fair!  you didn't even want this!* 

(and to be fair to both of them, from what I see, they are both super fabulous moms and are thrilled with their kids)

After my miscarriage we had to wait 6 months.  It seemed like an eternity.  We're not getting any younger.  I'm scared to go past 35.  I'm only 33 now, but in about 6 months I'll be 34, and I want 2 kids.  you do the math.

*sigh*

We are going to start saving as much as we can right now for adoption.  I don't want to go though fertility treatments.  hormone injections and all that jazz.  I'd rather just adopt.  We've got enough adoption around us that it's not an odd concept at all. 
I know it seems a little early and pessimistic, but truly, I'd want to get the ball rolling in 2015 if we haven't gotten pregnant yet.  Even national adoption isn't inexpensive.

And Hey!  If we get pregnant, we have an early start on college fund!


So I guess what I'm saying it that people who don't want to get pregnant really need to start using protection, yer stealin' all the babies from the people who are *trying* to have one!  (yes, I'm kidding!!)

Keep sending all the baby love my way.  I'm not worried, just, every month is such a disappointment.  My spirit falls a little.

Time to get healthy.  That can't hurt right? 

(I wish J would stop smoking too)

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