Monday, August 1, 2016


Now that Bunny is talking like a maniac, trying to put sentences together, I'm more careful than ever about the way I use words.
And I'm going to set one thing straight.  I swear in front of him.  I don't name call, but, well, I have a potty mouth.  I've curbed it some, but when I'm mad a 'fuck' and 'shit' come out.  and that's ok.  But that's not what I'm talking about here. 
I'm talking about being intentional about how I phrase things. 
I say fire fighter, mail carrier, police officer, garbage collector, backhoe operator, *whatever* worker/driver/person over ending all of those with 'man'.  Sure, most of them are men, but I'm trying to be inclusive.
I try to narrate what he's doing, rather than over praising.  "wow!  you got to the top!!  Look at that!".  "Are you cleaning the table?  That is a kind thing to do.",  rather than so many "GOOD JOB!"s. 
I'm careful with how I say 'no' and 'stop'.  Reversing it if you will.  "slow feet", "soft voice", "gentle hands".  Although stop and no come out a lot.
The intentional speech that made me think about writing this is using the word thoughtful.  Mostly in the place of helpful.  Because, lets be real.  2.5 year olds are not often actually helpful.  He does try though.  I want to make it clear that I notice, and make it clear when he really *is* being helpful.  Because there are a few tasks he does that is helpful.  Putting laundry in, or out of, the dryer.  Wiping up pee accidents.  Opening doors. 
I also use the word kind.  I don't tell him he is kind (even though he is).  I tell him he is being kind.  That what he is doing is a kind action.  I also say the opposite.  Than an action is unkind.
Any thing you are intentional about saying?

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