Sunday Morning

I have this amazing sense of peace right now.  I was about to say I wish I could share it with you, but I can in a way, after I write this I'll do a tonglen meditation directed specifically at those who are reading this post!  Cool.

This is a much nicer feeling than I had yesterday.  First day of my cycle is always the pits.  Tired, grumpy and sore.  It's amazingly hard to remember to accept when I'm feeling so terrible.  I took a pill instead.  I had a conversation with my mom once regarding remembering to notice and accept your moods.  She advised that in the beginning it doesn't matter *when* you notice.  Just that you do.  If it hits you a week later that you where a real grump, that's ok.  Accept it and move forward.  The more you remember the sooner you notice, and one day you will notice *before* a negative reaction happens.  I want to stress the word reaction.  Emotions are emotions and are there for a reason.  Anger isn't BAD.  Hitting is bad though.  Get my drift?

I'm getting too deep for a Sunday morning now. Ha ha.  I'm going to go back to listening to the rain and enjoying my coffee and waiting for Kiki to come drop in.  (geeze, she's up early on a Sunday!  good thing I've already lazed abed for over an hour already)

Don't let this rainy day get you down.  Here is an early morning November Rose.

walking

I decided I didn't want to listen to music walking home last night.  It's about a half hour walk.  I decided that I was going to 'be in the moment'.  I was, and it was a good walk.  I practiced tonglen, and smiled at strangers.  (aren't I amazing?)  I did some passive thinking, had conversations with people.  I got to thinking about how a lot of people see Buddhism and kind of martyrdom.  Taking on suffering and suffering in it.  It's not like that at all.  Tonglen practice is simply breathing in the feeling of suffering, taking it, changing it, and breath out, essentially, the opposite.  I like to think in analogies, so I came up with this:  it's like baking a cake.  you put in all these raw, potentially harmful ingredients into an oven, and it processes and is something 'good'.  Don't ask me how.  It just is.